Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Randomize