I'm sorry my penis didn't work
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize