will power is for people who don't want to get laid
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Randomize
