i just wanna soil my oats bro
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize
