david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Randomize
