How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
