so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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