no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
This baby is an asshole
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
