Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
