it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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