my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
My feet surprised me
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