Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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