he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
