There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
