I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize