shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize