they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
