brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
