and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Everclear isn't food dammit
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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