So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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