I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
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