I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize