Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
