This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Is Oprah even human
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Randomize
