No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize