why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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