Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
