My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
false alarm. still invincible.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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