Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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