walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
