ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
