Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
