I seem to have left my pride at pride
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
