Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
