hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
