i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
