you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
