Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
