i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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