The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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