By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Randomize
