So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
