Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize