you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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