Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
