I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
