Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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