it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
