What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
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