school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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