no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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