To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Randomize
